self-care Archives - The Self-Worth Experiment

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How to boost your immune system against coronavirus
Apr 10

How to boost your immune system against coronavirus

By Dr Berni Sewell | Love yourself

Novel coronavirus, severe acute respiratory syndrome coronavirus 2 (SARS-CoV-2), has the world in its clutches.

Since I wrote the first part of the “What to do if you panic about coronavirus” series a couple of weeks ago, the number of infected people has risen to more than 1.4 million worldwide and over 80,000 more have died with COVID-19.

The number of new cases surges at a terrifying pace. With the global panic pandemic spreading faster still.

And all we can do is delay the inevitable. Wait out the storm. Hoping for the best while fearing the worst.

Because we have no treatment for the new virus strain.

And we feel out of control. Powerless. At the mercy of a ruthless enemy, with no pharmacological weapon to slay it.

We are defenceless.

Or are we?

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Understanding the root cause of your anxiety
Feb 27

Understanding the root cause of your anxiety (to finally heal)

By Dr Berni Sewell | Overcome your fears

I noticed lately that anxiety is creeping up on me again.

Several times in the last few weeks, if only for a moment, its invisible, cold hand clutched my chest and twisted my stomach. Especially before meetings, teleconferences or when I had to go out. Even if it was only to take the cat to the vet or my daughter to ballet lesson.

Now, I know what you’re thinking.

I’ve told you many times that I overcame my anxiety. I keep instructing you on ways how to eliminate the fear. And maybe that’s the reason why you are still reading my emails. Maybe you are hoping that you can free yourself from anxiety if you do what I did.

Because I succeeded.

So, to hear that anxiety is still part of my life must feel like a slap in the face. WTF, right?

But the thing is that I am not worried by anxiety’s return. I am not scared that I will be doomed to a life paralysed by fear. That I will return to a life sentence of misery. Trying to function in the world without anybody noticing my constant state of terror. Pretending that I’m fine while battling a fire-breathing monstrosity every minute of every day. Mortified of people’s judgements whenever I fail to contain the panic.

Been there, done that. Can’t recommend.

I no longer fear anxiety. It doesn’t make me feel like a failure, or a hopeless case. Or, in fact, a hypocrite.

Because I know something now I wish someone had told me 20 years ago. How much suffering it would have spared me.

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How to practice self-love
Feb 01

How to practice self-love (with this 14-minute self-care ritual)

By Dr Berni Sewell | Love yourself

Tell me. Do you love yourself?

If your response to this question is “No” or “Uhmmm…” or a doubtful “Sometimes?” (usually accompanied by a knotting of the brows), answer me this.

Why not? Why can you not love yourself?

And that’s when your mind kicks in…
• Because I am not perfect, not good enough, not attractive, fit, wealthy enough.

• Because I am too old, too fat, too short, too lazy, stupid or selfish.

• Because my parents neglected me, my friends rejected me, my partner left me.

• Because I made too many mistakes, failed too many times, hurt too many people.

• Because I feel guilty for letting others down, am ashamed and disappointed with myself.

• Because I am single, lonely, behind in my career.

• Because I suffer from anxiety, depression or health issues.

• Because I am worthless and don’t deserve to be loved.

So many reasons to hate yourself.

But are your past mistakes really reason enough to abstain from self-love? After all, you are a different person now. You grew, evolved, make better choices.

And wouldn’t you look past other people’s flaws and shortcomings and still love them regardless? So why can’t you extend the same courtesy to yourself?

Even if nobody in this world loved you or cared for you (which is highly unlikely, by the way, no matter what your mind may tell you), wouldn’t this just be more reason to love yourself? Everybody needs love, right?

So, what’s the real reason why self-love is such a struggle for you?

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How to get
Jan 18

How to get me-time (and stop being irritable)

By Dr Berni Sewell | Love yourself

Have you ever asked yourself why you get so irritable?

When, all of a sudden, you feel so annoyed, or angry, or maybe upset that you could scream, cry. Tell everybody around you to just Fuck off.

It comes out of nowhere.

Ambushing you without warning.
One moment you think you are fine. The next you could strangle every person who wants something or dares to even talk to you.

The pressure in your chest chokes your breath and your brain screams: “Everybody just shut up!”

And it’s not like you at all.
You don’t usually snap at people. Or hurt them. You aren’t always so over-emotional or hyper-sensitive.

And you sure as hell don’t normally swear.

But, in this very moment, you can’t help it. It feels like you are possessed. It’s surreal.

And afterwards, when the short-tempered storm has passed, you feel so embarrassed. So guilty for being awful to the people in your life. For fighting with your partner, making the kids cry or causing your co-workers to retreat with this look of judgement in their disbelieving eyes.

You lost it.

Now you have to deal with the damage. And the shame.
You feel like you can’t live with yourself. You beat yourself up for being a terrible, emotionally unstable person. Lay awake at night seeking an explanation for your mood swings. Wrecking your brain.

Why do you become so irritable, out of the blue, without reason? What is wrong with you?

When the answer is: Nothing. Nothing is wrong with you.
You are just neglecting something essential.

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